What I'm Reading

Every time I finish a writing assignment I find myself craving new reading material. Probably because I need to refill the well. Here is what I'm reading.

Get thy to a bookstore and get a copy of I Was Told There'd Be Cake by Sloane Crosley. This New York Times Bestselling author is frickin' hysterical. The book contains about ten essays that cover being a reluctant maid of honor, what to do with ones pony collection before you parents find it, and the boss from hell. Sloane Crosley is totally laugh out loud funny. I will never again hear the word pony and not want to giggle.
I am just starting on Miranda July's book of stories No One Belongs Here More Than You and it is clear this is going to be excellent! I was introduce to the way Miranda's mind works when I rented her movie Me and You and Everyone We Know. Trippy stuff. Clearly an exceptional writer.
Just picked up Chelsy Handler's book My Horizontal Life. It's a collection of stories about her sex life (mostly one night stands). I can't say I am a huge fan of her comedy show, but she did get this great write up in Entertainment Weekly so I figured I would use my recently acquired Borders gift card and see what all the fuss is about. I read the first couple pages and she definitely has a way of telling a story. And can you go wrong when sex is the main subject?

And to round things off, I have the recent issues of Entertainment Weekly, Script Magazine, and Filmmaker for when I need inspiration around the business and technique of screenwriting and filmmaking.

What are you reading?

Michelle
www.girlchildpress.com

Wouldn't It Just Be Easier to be Fat?!

For our annual two week beach vacation to Outer Banks, NC my girlfriend and I vowed to be more active. We were going to rent bikes, take walks, and run on the beach. This vow would challenge our notion that drinking a six pack of beer while putting on sunscreen does indeed qualify as cardio. This year we were not going to sit on the beach and get fat(ter)!

So when she suggested we go hiking at the Nags Head Woods Preserve, our first week there, I was game. We got to the preserve bright and early Saturday morning and was as prepared as you think you need to be when hiking at the beach: shorts, sunscreen, water, and a cute hat. The minute we got out of the car we were attacked by mosquitoes the size of newborns. So we did what any city girl would do; we got back in the car and headed off to Walgreens for an economy size of Deep Woods Off!



Dripping in Off, and like Bill Murray in Ground Hog Day, we returned to the scene of the crime to start over. Our first trail was an easy quarter mile stoll that we completed in five minutes. I was feeling proud of myself and ready to celebrate with some steaming pancakes at Stack'em High. But then some body started feeling like Ms. Adventure.

What you need to know about my traveling companion. She reports that she is part Native American. Specifically, the Lumbee Tribe. I'll wait while you go look it up. I didn't believe they existed either. You're back? You learn something new every day, right?

Anyway, Sacajawea, who considers herself a natural when it comes to directions, suggested that we take the Sweet Gum Trail, a half mile loop that would take you "deeper into the forest." As I adjusted my cute hat, I couldn’t help but think was I going to see anything different in the “deeper” part than I did in the nice easy part. Woods can’t be that dramatically different, can they? But I decided not to be a killjoy and go along with the program. Just because I couldn't find my way to the grocery store without activating the GPS, wasn't a reflection on her skills. Sweet Gum Trail it was.

What you need to know about me. If it doesn’t involve my computer, journal, or having cocktails with friends, I am scared of everything. So believe me, going along on this little vision quest, was me being a brave girl.

The first five minutes of the hike was relatively uneventful. Then we arrived at the first fork in the road and our first disagreement of the trip. I, the GPS dependent one, wanted to go straight(ish) while Pocahontas wanted to go left. We went left. I will save the cliff hanger for another story and let you know now that she was absolutely wrong!

For the next ten minutes we crawled up some steep embankment. Waded through a sea of spider webs. Got hit upside the head by a bunch of branches (from the famed sweet gum trees, I assume), and ended up in a leafy clearing that looked ripe for a bunch of crazy-ass militia people to come storming out of and killing us. Then the path just ended. I tried not to panic. Nothing just ends. Not even bad relationships. So we rooted around looking for where the path might pick back up. Now for all of you sitting there looking perplexed and wondering out loud why we didn’t just turn around and walk back out the way we came in, how do you think scary movies are made? You have to ignore the obvious answer or the story would be over in ten minutes.

After a couple half joking “where do we go from here, Pocahontas?” we saw the sandy trail on the other side of the trees. Surely we would be back at the visitor’s center in no time. As we trudged along, a thought, that I had been trying to suppress, broke free: We are lost! When I shared this little tidbit with my Indian Scout she immediately shot me down. According to Little Know It All Feather, “you can’t really get lost in a preserve.” It seems that because the Nature Conservancy oversees the woods that we were trudging around in this shielded us from getting lost in the over 420 acre maritime forest (one of three in the world).

Anyone want to guess what she got on the logic portion of the GRE?

I took a big breath and kept walking. After about ten more minutes we came upon a trail marker. The markers are used as sign post to let hikers know where they are on the trail and provide some fascinating fact about the spot that they are standing on. Sweet Gum Trail allegedly has 8 markers. The fascinating and concerning fact about this marker was that it had a number one on it. This should be impossible since we had been walking long enough that we should have seen at least five of these markers already. But not to be deterred or convinced we were lost - Ms. Adventure continued on. By the time we got to marker five I was convince we weren’t even on the Sweet Gum Trail anymore and started to envision what the evening news was going to say about us. Two Washington, DC black girls went missing at 8:30am at Nags Head Woods Preserve. One is believed to be wearing a cute hat. By the time CNN picked up the story, Wolf Blitzer and Anderson Cooper would be rattling off the previous years statistics of the number of people who got lost in nature preserves, and questioning the authenticity of the Lumbee tribe.

At marker eight we saw a set of man-made steps that seemed to come out of nowhere. They were anachronistic to say the least, but we climbed them. Convinced that the visitor’s center would be at the top. It wasn’t. What was at the top was a sandy trail. The SAME sandy trail that we saw back at marker one. I had to resist the urge not to push Ms. Adventure back down the stairs. To her credit, she never caved in to me whining that we were lost. This of course annoyed me more.

By the time we got to another fork in the road, and I was sweating like a lost pig, I had had enough. I was not taking another step until she could guarantee that around the bend was the parking lot and our air condition equipped car. With a straight face she suggested that she could leave me there and hopefully come back when she found the visitor's center. The Jedi Mind Trick worked. I kept walking.

A couple of minutes later, like an oasis in the desert, the visitor’s center appeared through the tree line. I damn near ran over Ms. Adventure to get to the car. I ignored the sound of her laughter as I plopped down in the front seat and jacked up the air. She laughed even harder when she realized I was not talking to her.

What was supposed to be a twenty minute hike turned into 70 plus minutes of sheer terror! Okay, I might be overstating just a tad, but she better count herself lucky that I don't believe in violence.


Michelle
www.girlchildpress.com

Yoga and Writing

Learning Yoga has been hard for me. As a tall, big woman I don't find it easy to manage my body in all those frickin' poses that seems to be a part of this yoga thing! This morning during yoga class, I was reminded of the level of difficulty. As I was attempting to switch out of a diving dolphin (designed to strengthen your core)I actually fell over. No, not stumbled, or gently tripped. FELL OVER! Right before I hit the wood floor (with the loudest thud ever heard by man), I thought to myself -this is my last class!' Thankfully, no one laughed and everyone seemed to keep their eyes on their own pose. The instructor gently gave me some tips on how to "create a stronger foundation" and continued on like I hadn't just made it crystal clear why some people should never step foot into a yoga studio.

Toward the end of the class the instructor gave us a series of complicated instructions that took us through a triangle pose ending with a one-legged pose. Her objective, for most of the class, was to get us to be mindful how light we could make our bodies if we just connected to it and focused our energies on making it do what we wanted it to. As I stood there with sweat pouring down my back, I distinctly remember thinking this chick is full of shit! But because I have home training, I decided it was rude to walk out so close to the end of the class and I complied.

Surprisingly, before it was all over, I did find my leg "lightly gliding" up into the one-legged pose. I was so pleased with myself that I couldn't hide the big smile that spread across my face. That one little accomplishment made the entire 75 minutes class a success for me.

During the closing meditation it crossed my mind how similar yoga and writing is in my life. Both activities I've entered into with complete free will. Shouldn't that make them easier than they are?

Namaste,
Michelle
www.girlchildpress.com

A Place to Live - Amazing Documentary!

I've been in LA for the last week and boy is my head full(more on that in tomorrow's blog). One of the things I'm out here doing is supporting my friend Carolyn Coal whose documentary A Place to Live premiered this week, to a sold out crowd, at the
26th Annual Outfest Film Festival. The documentary follows 7 individuals as they attempt to secure a home in Triangle Square, Hollywood, the nation's first affordable housing project for LGBT seniors. This film will take you through a roller coaster of emotions. I pride myself on not being a big crier but even I bawled like a baby. For those in the LA area, Outfest has added a second showing of the documentary: Sunday, July 20, 2008 at 12:00 noon at the Regency Fairfax Theatre. If you are not in the LA area I'm sure the film will also make appearances in other film festivals around the country. For more info check out the website www.aplacetolivemovie.com and the trailer below.

The Tao of Will Smith

I've always been a moderate fan of Will Smith. Definitely dug him during his Fresh Prince (of Bel Air) days and I've seen a good number of his feature films since he's become a major movie star. Went to see "Hancock" this weekend - I give it a C. Entertaining, but too many "logic holes" that kept me picking the story apart a full day after I saw it.

After seeing the movie (not because of its quality), I started to think how has this black man become an INTERNATIONAL movie star. That's what he is considered. Any article or interview done on him, the fact that he "translates" all over the world will be discussed. So how does that happen? I've heard on more than a few occasions that films starring black folks just don't do that great beyond North America. The quest for the answer led me through this extensive information portal that landed me on youtube. I came across a few interviews with the international movie star himself, where he specifically talks about the translation issue.

His success formula come down to two things: research and hard work. When he started his transition to film, Will and his manager looked at the top ten all time grossing films and they discovered they were all action films. Action films with special effects. Action films with special effects and monsters. Action films with special effects and a love story. So Will decided that is what he would specialize in - action films (with any of those variations). This twelve year specialization now allows him to do any film that he wants (Hitch, Ali, Pursuit of Happyness) and because of his film choices he is by far the most bankable star on the planet. He says in Hollywood it is all about can you make the powers-that-be money. They don't care about your race as long as they get a return on their investment.

Will's stance on hard work is equally straightforward. For him, if he wants something he simply goes after it. He puts all his energy, focus and time on achieving his desired goal. He acknowledges that it seems like a pretty simple premise, but he says a lot of folks that he has seen come up short in his business is because they stopped short of giving it all they had. In the end someone else swoops in and takes that plum role or project. In being clear about his work ethic he says he never spends time "getting ready" because he is "always ready." He is always doing his homework and he is watching the trends as it pertains to his business. He freely admits he is a workaholic and more than has something to show for it.

After spending a couple hours on this informal research project I couldn't help but reflect on where I stood as it relates to Will's success formula. The hard work was definitely in place. I know how to log in the hours necessary to pull off a myriad of miracle projects. But the research piece has to get stronger. I need to feel more comfortable about knowing what I know. Where I come up short is not giving myself enough time to do the exhaustive research (not counting this pop culture moment)and applying it.

Hmmm, all this from a two hour, relatively okay movie. I guess lessons can come from all kinds of unexpected places.

Michelle
www.girlchildpress.com

Right On!

I guess the Universe got tired of my whining.
I just received word from the editor at Right On! magazine that Just Like A Girl: A Manifesta! will be highlighted in their October edition (will hit the newsstands in early September). YIPPEE!

Until Later!
Michelle
www.girlchildpress.com

Blockage

No, I am not talking about the kind that has you running for a laxative or scheduling a high colonic (but a good metaphor is in there somewhere). I am talking about the kind of blockage that stops you from producing as an artist.

Over the last 6 weeks I've been on treadmill to nowhere or at least that's what it feels like. I've had tons of projects on my plate, but more than a few haven't gone exactly as I planned. The screenplay I was hired to write and that was slated to go into production this summer has stalled out, the comedy script I'm trying to write, in preparation for a prestigous fellowship, is feeling terribly unfunny, and I've sent out dozens of review copies of the most recent anthology and have not heard a peep back from any of the reviewers.

With all this lack of movement, I've gotten into this serious funk. I can't even keep up with my obligation to this blog. Mostly I've been questioning what the hell am I doing. Who told me I could be a screenwriter, an editor, a publisher, a poet, or an activist? All the things I love to do, but all of them feel like a chore right now.

I've been journaling about my anemic artist state for weeks, but it wasn't until I picked up my old copy of the Artist's Way this afternoon was I able to name what is going on with me. FEAR! Fear is the undoing of many an artist - most more talented than me. After reading through a couple of chapters I'm slowly coming to terms with what has been going on.

I'm in this stage of my artist's life where more than a few people have deemed me "good". Good enough to pay me for a product, good enough to book me for a gig, or good enought to pitch me an idea. Somewhere along the way "good" has been translated to "expectation" and that is freakin' me the hell out. What if they don't like what I've written and want their money back? What if they hate my reading or performance? What if they tell other people that I'm not that talented and they believe them. "What if" is driving me around the bend. In some ways it has frozen me - allowing the self-doubt to burrow deeper.

A lot of the things that I used to do, when there was no expectation, suddenly feel foreign and awkward. I'm feeling very self-aware - which in this case is not a good thing. I normally don't publicly write about my artistic struggles, but one of the things that The Artist's Way recommends is to speak the truth and free yourself of the myths that you are burdening yourself with. So I figured a public unburdening would do me good. My myth - that I must be perfect at everything I do - is stopping me from getting on with my current projects and discovering new projects.

What I like about The Artist's Way is that it is an action guide. Every chapter requires you to do something. Actually, a bunch of somethings. I read and completed The Artist's Way back in 2001 and one of the habits I've held on to are the morning pages. I journal every day! Journaling helps to get things out of your head and also helps you record patterns and trends. I took the time to read a couple of my journals this weekend and I discovered something very interesting - I've been on the way to an "artist crisis" for more than a few months now. Because I don't make a habit of reading my journals (when I'm finished with one I just stack it on my altar with the others and move on to another one)I wasn't able to see this coming. I've been lamenting in various ways that I feel like I need to make a major decision about how I am using my time (to create) and I've not been able to come up with a suitable solution. Mostly I've been trying to avoid the discomfort associated with a solution, but you can't hide from the inevitable and the Universe will keep bring "it" back to your attention.

I guess the only real way to free myself from this current state is to finally make that damn decision.

Stay tuned!

Michelle
www.girlchildpress.com